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NFB: Why are men happier?

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  • NFB: Why are men happier?

    Men Are Just Happier People-- What do you expect from such simple
    creatures?


    Your last name stays put.


    The garage is all yours.



    Wedding plans take care of themselves.


    Chocolate is just another snack.



    You can be President.


    You can never be pregnant.


    You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.


    You can wear NO shirt to a water park.


    Car mechanics tell you the truth.



    The world is your urinal.


    You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one
    is just too icky.


    You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.


    Same work, more pay.


    Wrinkles add character.


    Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$100.


    People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.


    The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.


    New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.



    One mood all the time.
    Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.


    You know stuff about tanks.


    A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.


    You can open all your own jars.


    You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.


    If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.



    Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.


    Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.



    You almost never have strap problems in public.


    You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.



    Everything on your face stays its original color.


    The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.


    You only have to shave your face and neck.



    You can play with toys all your life.


    Your belly usually hides your big hips.


    One wallet and one pair of shoes one color for all seasons.


    You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.


    You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife.


    You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.



    You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25
    minutes.



    No wonder men are happier...
    Dave M
    Life, liberty, and the pursuit of all who threaten it!



  • #2
    "you know stuff about tanks"
    True dat! I barely know anything about a tank, but I do know some stuff. That out right made me laught!!!

    2005 GTO, Quicksilver, 6-Speed, DynaTech LT's and thats it. 366.6 hp/366.7 tq last time I checked.
    Sold-1995 Dark GreenTrans Am, Auto 63K. BBK Headers/off-road y-pipe/Hooker Exhaust/LPI CAI/Hypertech...need some money!!!

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    • #3
      Good post, Dave. Some funny.... and true things on there.

      "You can be President" - Too funny
      SOLD: 2002 Trans Am WS.6 - Black on Black - 6 Speed
      SLP Loudmouth Exhaust
      17K Miles

      2005 Acura TL - Silver on Black
      Navigation - Surround Audio - Bluetooth

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      • #4
        I count my blessings almost every day. Especially once a month.

        Comment


        • #5
          Hahahaha...some funny stuff there.

          I was laughing when you said we buy underwear 3 packs for $8.95. Ironically, this morning, I just bought a couple 3 packs at walmart for $7.95 each
          black 95 t/a, a4, beefed up tranny w/ higher stall converter, transgo shift kit, trans temp gauge, trans cooler, richmond 3.73's, loudmouth, hypertech programmer, 160 thermo, descreened maf, TB bypass and airfoil, trick flow intake elbow, underdrive pulleys, moroso cai, edelbrock panhard rod, bmr stb, slp sfc's, fiberglass firehawk hood, hawk pads, taylor wires, ngk plugs, royal purple fluids,...and hopefully more to come

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          • #6
            Originally posted by Joe 1320
            I count my blessings almost every day. Especially once a month.
            As well you should.... actually to me on that account y'all have the bad end of the deal... we get to be total B****es and have an excuse... y'all are the ones that have to deal with it... although I'm fairly convinced that 99.9% of my guy friends have WAY worse PMS than I do!!
            this post is so true..well most of it... i kinda didn't like the comments that make all girls seem as though they don't know anything about "guy stuff"... but it's still funny because most girls don't..... and..... I'm not PMSin' today so you're off the hook for those comments!!
            '07 Black Tahoe LTZ (my new baby)

            '96 White Firebird (sold )

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            • #7
              Originally posted by zebragirl83
              I'm not PMSin' today so you're off the hook for those comments!!
              whew!


              Comment


              • #8
                Ironic part about that whole post is I found every one of those things to be true
                96 Camaro Z28, T-tops, 6 Speed, Slp CIA, Flowmaster cat-back, 3:42 gears

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                • #9
                  Originally posted by 96Camaro
                  Ironic part about that whole post is I found every one of those things to be true
                  Well my friend.. then you aren't hangin' around the right girls... I promise all of you there are girls out there that have these "problems" down to a minimum... and we're usually the ones that don't seem to get the guys.... but whatever... I think secretly y'all like having girls that drive you crazy...
                  '07 Black Tahoe LTZ (my new baby)

                  '96 White Firebird (sold )

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Originally posted by zebragirl83
                    I think secretly y'all like having girls that drive you crazy...
                    No way! ..... can't stand the drama and the associated baggage. When my marriage went south 6 years ago, I ended up with everything. My son, the house, the cars, the bank accounts, the debt, and most of all my sanity. I hate to say it, but that's why I avoid women like the plague. Life has been fantastic since. All the debts paid off, my son is very well adjusted and most of all the drama is negligable. Don't get me wrong, I like women.... just not the drama and BS. My sister isn't that way at all, so I know not all women are like that. I've just discovered I'm much happier and not in debt without them.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Joe 1320
                      No way! ..... can't stand the drama and the associated baggage. When my marriage went south 6 years ago, I ended up with everything. My son, the house, the cars, the bank accounts, the debt, and most of all my sanity. I hate to say it, but that's why I avoid women like the plague. Life has been fantastic since. All the debts paid off, my son is very well adjusted and most of all the drama is negligable. Don't get me wrong, I like women.... just not the drama and BS. My sister isn't that way at all, so I know not all women are like that. I've just discovered I'm much happier and not in debt without them.
                      Man that quote is true, dont get me wrong i love my fiance to death and would do anything for her that i possibly could. But the drama associated with simple tasks and everyday habits gets really annoying. Sometimes i dont know if i can handle it and i want to give up. But love holds everything together and there is nothing like it on earth. I know some people havent experienced it but for those who have, experienced true love, you cant even put it into words and it makes everything worth while and gives meaning to life.
                      1995 LT1 bird
                      10" 2800 stall coan converter,beefed tranny, supreme shift,motive 373 gears,3 inch catback with a flowmaster muffler, pcmforless tuned,slp cold air intake,tb bypassed, better flowing intake elbow, air foil,poly trans mount.
                      275/40/17 Nitto NT555R extreme drags in rear

                      2005 Dode SRT-4
                      agp billet adjustable wastegate,Maxxfab 3 inch catless downpipe, borla catback ,K&N drop in filter,mapclamped,tuned,mopar blow off valve, Prothane motor mount inserts,21 pounds of boost!
                      6 dics cd changer, 10 inch MTX fully loaded with moonroof and viper style seats

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                      • #12
                        Awesome list, but women do have something on us, among a few things I'm sure, but this ones a biggie.

                        When they're in the mood, 99.9999999999% of the time they get it. Our percentages aren't even close to that, except for the few guys that lucked out with a nymph. They have that part covered.










                        j/k
                        97 Chevy 'Raro Z28 M6- Ported & Polished LT1 heads,beehives,1.6/1.94 valves, 226/231 custom cam,K&N FIPK, 94-95 BBK shorty's,ORY,Magnaflow Catback,no cats,BMR LCA Relocation Brackets,Lower Control Arms,Adjustable Panhard Bar,Eibach Pro Kit,SPEC Stage 1,Walbro 255 Fuel Pump,30LB Injectors,Pro 5.0,Short stick,MSD 8.5's,NGK TR55's,LT4KM

                        01 Honda CBR600 F4i-Two bro's,Corbins,SS brake lines

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