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  • NFB Riceboy list

    Found this old email and it made me laugh...thought I would share it.

    You know you're a Riceboy if...
    ... you find yourself using the excuse yo, but you gots twice as many
    cylindas, du' after EVERY race
    ... you drive a 4 door 'type R'
    ... your gumby pants make it hard to shift
    ... more than 20 of your mods involve sheilding what's actually underneath
    ... you have stickers that even most asians dont get
    ... you have stickers for parts you dont have
    ... you refer to 50hp as the 'big shot'
    ... your car has so much camber it can drive on its side
    ... when you drive by, WWII veterans run for shelter
    ... your exhaust tip diameter is 4 times the inner muffler diameter
    ... you have 'power by' anything anywhere on a car made by the engine
    manufacturer
    ... birds make nests on your spoiler because its taller than the trees
    ... you sell crack for the image...not the money
    ... you have 'N/T' polished on the side of car and you dont know what
    bracket racing is...
    ... you will only race if the other guy removes four sparkplugs
    ... you can't race uphills
    ... you have "All Motor" emblazoned on your rear hatch right next to your
    14.50 dial in
    ... you brag to have nitrous and have a 14.50 dial in
    ... your exhaust system for your 1.8L is bigger than most Pro-stock cars
    ... you spent more money on stickers and stripes than your parents paid for
    your car
    ... you go to a performance shop and immediately start rummaging through the
    decal bin
    ... your tach is bigger than your head
    ... you have a shiftlight and your car is an automatic
    ... you refuse to race because it's a "show car"
    ... your only mods are cut factory springs and a 5" chrome exhaust tip
    ... at Autocross events you don't participate because you have a drag race
    setup and at drag events you brag about kicking ass on the autocross.
    ... you have more lights on the front of your car than the USS Voyager
    ... you brag about a turbo kit that never seems to get installed.
    ... your exhaust sounds like a dying Moose
    ... your bright green $300 air filter is bigger than your engine.
    NBM '02 Z, SLP Lid, Corsa Cat-Back
    (SOLD 07/03/2004)

  • #2
    ...if you hook up two cans of lysol in your wheel wells, connected to a switch on your dash so that you can "purge" your NOS at stop lights, while disenfecting at the same time

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